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Due to conflict of schedule I regret to inform you that The Big Reviewski will no longer be handled. For now our writers have moved on to other projects. Some day I hope to bring this project back but for now my time lies elsewhere. If you enjoyed the articles you may find our writers work at: http://nerdpop.net/wordpress2/
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In a Nutshell: The Possession

0 out of 5 Lebowski’s

Starring: Jeffery Dean Morgan and Kyra Sedgewick

Directed by Ole Bornedal
 

I read an article on this movie stating that it was the PG-13 version of the Exorcist.

Well let me be the 1^st to say, the Exorcist scared me.

The Possession makes me want to go watch something else.

I feel like writing a review isn’t fair. This movie is that bad.

1^st off it just seems generic. It seems like they knew what they were going after, and they decided to add some meat, that never truly develops nor even has the chance to. It seems like they literally wanted to make a rated PG-13 Exorcist movie that should've been called "The Exorcist: -2.0 the Jewish version!"

I love what could’ve been in Jeffery Dean Morgan’s character, and he does a great job of not completely annoying us. He’s the typical dad that is never there, still seemingly in love with the life that he left behind, but jumps at the chance to truly get what he really wants in life: Be a college basketball coach. Which if it had more meat, would’ve been an interesting plot and added more depth, and possibly more thrills to the movie. Whenever he is a Dad, it’s once again, the typical, can’t cook, so he buys pizza. Late for everything but thinks that the best thing to do is to buy his way into his daughter’s hearts.

Kyra Sedgewick is boring. I really like her as an actress, but this is just a paycheck for her. Her character has no interesting bone in her body, or script. Her character obviously still has feelings for Dean Morgan, which asks the question when and why did they get divorced? And why, if it was recent, is everyone okay with the new boyfriend coming around so often? It doesn’t make sense, and I don’t think anyone cares.

Back to Mr. Dean Morgan, the Javier Bardem American knock off.  

So he buys them whatever they want. Problem is, what he buys them could kill them. A mysterious box appears from the holocaust, which is a pretty cool story, one of the 2 things that could've made this a good movie. And then, one of the daughters starts acting looney. The fingers coming out of the throat while having a cough is pretty cute.

Exactly.

It’s cute. It gets you a little bit, but it never freaks you out.

So the moth’s come, the bodies pile, “The Posession” starts to happen. Pun intended. The Rabbi's start getting involved, knowing the history of the box and acting is if they were waiting for it or running from it. One of them is brave enough to fight the good fight. Then all hell breaks loose, mimicking or resembling every "Possession" movie in the past 40 years starting from the one it tries to be like most in the Exorcist.

Problem is, it gives none of those movie's any justice. It makes the Unborn look like the Pulp Fiction of scary movies.
You probably don't remember The Unborn, and that's good for you.

I actually wanted to take a nap a few times. And this is coming from the guy that loved “The Devil Inside” but agrees that it was the worst possession movie ever because of its stupid ending.

Well move over, Devil’s Inside, the Devil was not inside the Posession.

It’s labeled a horror movie, when really it shouldn’t have been under anything. It should’ve never been made.

The ending is a joke, and like I said it’s not amusing. It’s a shame that movies like this are made, and probably make millions in profit. But there are other great horror films like the 1^st 2 Rec. films that will never be watched in the United States, because of crap like this and the Quarantine movies, and the Snakes on A Plane’s and blah, blah, blah.

In a Nutshell: The Possession is the worst horror movie I’ve seen with so much publicity. It’s a horror movie, with absolutely no horror. You don’t laugh at it either, you just wonder why you can’t get a refund. Or better than that, why you can’t have that 1 hour and 30 minutes back to go watch another movie.  

The Dude Documentary

Not many people know that the Dude from The Big Lebowski is based off of a real person. Here is a documentary about his story. Enjoy and ABIDE.

In a Nutshell: The Campaign

2 out of 5 Lebowski's

To say that Will Ferrell is becoming the next Adam Sandler is a pretty bold statement. Even sad at the same time. Sandler has milked Hollywood at the expense of his fans for over 5 years now. He was a classic comedian, from Billy Madison all the way to Waterboy and Mr. Deeds. The Wedding Singer to me is my 2^nd favorite comedy of all time. What he’s done is become a joke inside of a joke. He has the same formula for every movie, and he keeps trying to become more diverse, giving himself accents and different looks, ie. The Longest Yard, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry. And though those movie had their moments, he continues to put inside jokes that just flat out, don’t work in his movies. And they always have these epic endings, that you know have no chance of happening in real life, ie. Anger Management, David Spade playing good bball in Grown Ups.

Any who, this isn’t about Adam Sandler. This is about Will Ferrell. The Campaign is Will Ferrell playing George Bush again. And it just seems old. Ferrell is up to his usual antics. Cursing, sex crazed, belligerent even when not drinking. Once again, he’s doing his best George Bush impersonation, while having the attitude of Ricky Bobby, and that dude in Blades of Glory. And Frank the Tank. And Ron Burgundy. And Jackie Moon. Ferrell still has that punch though, the one that Sandler had for such a long time. They have both graced us with classics, and they will most definitely still make serious bucks in the box office, just because of the IQ of the people that will still stand in line to watch their movies (Unless it’s Anchorman 2, which I will stand in line for). It’s time for Ferrell to do what his real fans know he’s good at: Being an actor. If that means being in a comedy, that’s fine. Being in Stranger Than Fiction, I’d love that. But if he wants to salvage his career before it spirals out of control, he needs to become more like Jim Carrey and not like Sandler. Stop beating stupidity into our heads, you’re better than that. You’re Frank the Tank. You’re Chazz from Wedding Crashers. Do you really want to be known for these last few comedies you’ve made? You’re the funniest guy in Hollywood Will, and you just let Zach Galifianakissonston get a leg over you. Do you really want to be known for this crap movie, with a few diamonds in it? Or Semi-Pro which also had diamonds in it? 

To  explain the movie, you would think they had something solid here. And at times, YES, it works. But most of the time it falls flat. Galiafinakis brings fresh, hilarious stuff to Marty Huggins. The innocent Republican whose life isn’t as innocent as it seems. Especially not till the ultimate sinner in the dirty Democratic politician of Cam Brady shows up in his life, and towards the latter part of the movie, gets a heart. As Brady and Huggins fight for their seat in the Senate, it's entertaining at times to watch how much they can screw each other over, via campaign ads, which just seem too unrealistic. Or Debates, which could be funnier. And once again, sometimes, YES, it works. But the way I’m beating that "it works" into your head is the same way Ferrell tries beating that George Bush, balls to the wall lifestyle living into our heads, and it’s just not that funny anymore. Scenes with Marty’s wife and Cam Brady live up to the hype, and so does a funny turn into comedy from Dylan McDermott and the always reliable Jason Sudeikis as their campaign managers. Dan Akroyd and John Lithgow show up, and the whole time you wonder, why did they show up? You understand the point of it, but they just seem disinterested as much as we are in the movie. And does Brian Cox really want to do this? He seemed so at ease as a sleazeball in the Bourne movies, and Troy. The best part of the film is watching what Marty does after a face-off with Cam. It's not when they actually face-off. Galiafinakis really carries the movie on his back. You have to watch everytime he's on the screen. From his awkward encounters with his wife's tongue, to his dinner table discussions with his children. He's really funny. Wish I could say the same for Ferrell.

I love Will Ferrell by the way, which is why I'm so disappointed. The exact same way I loved Sandler before Little Nicky hit theatres.

In a Nutshell: Ferrell needs a new formula. Using Jay Roach to direct this film might’ve saved the day a few years ago, but he also just directed Dinner For Schmucks a few years ago. That’s not good, and showing he lost his touch a little.  The film has its moments, but falls flat most of the time. Maybe if Ferrell would’ve played Marty Huggins, and Zach played Cam Brady, this movie would’ve been hilarious instead of having its moments and just settling for being watchable.     

In a Nutshell: The Expendables 2

3 1/2 out of 5 Lebowski's

Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Chuck Norris, Dolph Lundgren, Liam Hemsworth and Jean Claude Van-Damme with Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger

This is by far Stallone’s best work since…umm…let’s say… I really don’t know…Get Carter? Stallone has made a punching bag out of himself lately. He had a promising career. Would you believe me if I told you that Rocky in the late 70’s won Academy Awards? It’s true. But then he came out with Like A Rhinestone Cowboy. Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot. All the unnecessary Rocky's. And a ton more. I never liked any of Rambo’s blood movies. It’s actually quite sad, because Stallone has had some serious hits. Which is why I’m so proud of him right now. He has actually hit the box office head on, with an original idea. Do what we all wished as kids, or young adults, and get these muscle heads in the same movie. It was great when we were younger, everyone had their own niche. Stallone had sequels, that only had a cult following, with the occasional hit that was worthy (Judge Dredd, The Specialist, Demolition Man, Get Carter, Daylight). Van Damme had his foot yielding/Roundhouse kicking bad ass films (Cyborg, Kickboxer, Blood Sport, Double Impact, TimeCop). Bruce Willis does whatever he damn well wants. He’s that good of an actor. Steven Seagal, though I don’t like, had his minions as well, I don’t know why. And Ahhnold was just the baddest dude on the planet, ask Predator, or James Cameron’s bank account. They were all good at it, and their wallets at the time, or Van Damme’s cocaine mountain on his coffee table, could prove it. But we all longed for them to make a film together. Especially since Van Damme and Lundgren’s, or Stallone and Lundgren’s Rocky IV, gave us a belly full of happiness. This makes the best part of the film, which is the fact that they all know what they are doing. They all know they were corny at one point, but the best in the business at the same time. And though its 30 years later, seeing them all grace the scene, the best thing I have to say about this movie, is that at least I’m not saying its 30 years too late.

There’s no plot, nor is there a point in having one. Stallone knows the ingredients, and with a new director in the always reliable Simon West (Con Air), the film knows it’s role, and it kicks ass and makes you laugh your ass off watching it. Schwarzenegger especially who seems to effortlessly thrive while making fun of himself and his compadres. He steals every scene, and to be honest, it feels good to see him in a movie again (Not just the cameo he had in the 1^st) and dropping his lines.

Van Damme doesn’t steal the show the way Ahhnold does with his one hand-gun wielding self, but he’s in too good of shape, and still looking pretty damn good to not be the physically able bad guy. Can you see Stallone fighting Chuck Norris in the finale, and making it realistic? Van Damme, though on coke, and with the 2^nd most mind numbing dialogue in his films (2nd to Steven Seagal and Stallone in a virtual tie) has always been able to impress. His roundhouse kicks, are the best roundhouse kicks. Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks are kindergarten compared to "The Muscles From Brussel's!" 

Statham of course is up for game. He’s underused in my opinion. Dolph Lundgren, Terry Crews and Randy Couture could be out of the film as well as they are on it. Stallone gives himself the steak while everyone else eats fish. Yes, he’s still in good shape, and yes he’s the genius and we thank him for bringing these giant’s together. But isn’t it better to have Statham, The Rock or even Karl Urban lead the way? Stallone deserves his shine, and he makes sure he gets it. But we all know Ahhnold is the baddest to ever do it. And what makes it cool to have Ahhnold and JCVD in the same movie, is that they are both the kings of corny 1 liners. JCVD, in my opinion has the funniest zinger of all time when Van Damme tells his girlfriend who confuses him with his twin brother in Double Impact: “I don’t even wear, a silk underwear.”  I'm talking about corny zingers, not the monumental punch lines that Ahhnold has given in his whole career.

In a nutshell: Schwarzenegger steals the movie, while Van Damme plays the best character. The film only works because the cast knows what it is, and doesn’t go over the top. Well they do, but its fun watching them. If you’re a big action nut, you won’t be disappointed. I would've honestly given this movie a 4 star rating. But I just feel like instead of taking this film seriously they just focused on nothing but fun. Maybe the next one will bring the real action and seriousness taking this franchise to the next level.

Community

    Community. I can go on for hours about this show and I really do feel that it is the best show on television, definitely the best comedy on. From the cast to the writing, it is perfect and consistently hilarious. The continuity on the show is ridiculous! The stories are fun and entertaining no matter how outrageous they can get. It is certainly on its way to being a cult classic (if it isn’t already).
    The first aspect of the show that got me hooked was the cast. Joel McHale, Gillian Jacobs, Yvette Nicole Brown, Alison Brie, Donald Glover, Danny Pudi, Chevy Chase, Jim Rash and Ken Jeong! Let that sink in. Donald Glover was actually the reason I started watching the show and I’ve always enjoyed Joel McHale on The Soup. Also love Alison Brie, she is beautiful and quite the comedian. I wasn’t originally a Ken Jeong fan but his roll as Chang completely “CHANGed” my opinion on him. He’s perfectly psychotic and hilarious and his physical comedy is genius. My personal favorite characters are Troy and Abed (Glover and Pudi). They have awesome chemistry and great timing with one another.
    One of the best qualities of the show is the chemistry between the actors. The viewer can really get the feel that they actually are all good friends. It appears that everyone is having a good time and it transfers to great character acting. Many of the actors are great at improvising and I feel like that’s where the best, and the funniest, material comes from. Not taking anything away from the writers, they are geniuses, and they come up with the most original material that I, personally, have never seen on television. They certainly aren’t afraid to “take it there” and they will do everything they can in an episode, well at least what the network will let them do.
    Continuity and attention to detail are noticeably an aspect that the writers and the prop department take to heart. There are very few flaws in the show which makes it especially enjoyable to watch. One particular example is in episode 3 of the second season. Abed (Pudi) is in the background in most of the episode where, at first, a pregnant student explains that he might be the father. Later in the episode he resolves the problem, deals with her current boy friend, and ultimately delivers her child in the back of a car. Mind you this takes place all in the background of an episode. So when it gets to episode 22 where Shirley (Brown) gives birth in their Anthropology class room Abed explains that he already delivered a baby once during the year. I really connected to this show because nobody does that. It makes the viewer appreciate the creative process that goes with creating each episode.
    Pushing each episode to be something completely different yet still following the basic premise is not an easy task but they do it beautifully. One of my favorite episode, well it’s actually two, is the season 2 finally; the paintball episodes. It is an outrageous idea. To have a huge paintball war in a community college is not an easy concept to get a viewer to buy but it works! You believe and completely buy into this idea and it makes for a great episode. Another concept that I have to mention is the blanket fort episodes. Again this isn’t an easy idea to sell but yet again it works. I personally love it because I love blanket forts. It took me back to being a kid and made me think why the hell did I stop making them? I can go on and on about which episodes are awesome but the truth is I can’t even pick an episode that I don’t like.
    This is the best show on television right now and I hope it continues it’s success. I know that going in to the 4th season they will be without Dan Harmon (creator) which is very upsetting. Having said that, I have complete faith in the producers, writers, and cast that this season will be even better than the previous three. I hope by writing this I convert you readers into fans of Community. This show has inspired me to write and push myself more into my acting career. It would be a dream to be on this show, one that I hope comes true.

In a Nutshell: Total Recall

Starring: Colin Farrell, Jessica Biel, Kate Beckinsale, Bryan Cranston and Bokeem Woodbine

3 out of 5 Lebowski's

I rate Total Recall with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sharon Stone amongst my top 10 greatest action movies of all time. The new Total Recall with Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel is not in my top 10, but this year it is one of a kind, because it’s a lot of fun.

It’s non-stop action, a pulse pounding performance from Beckinsale, and great chemistry between Farrell and Biel. If you haven’t noticed, that’s what I look for in movies.

Relationships can be dry, just like the movie if it leads can’t work well together. The film is so much fun, I honestly was on the edge of my seat the entire film. Especially when the scene stealing Beckinsale graced us with her presence. She is a firecracker in a film that’s already lit with c4. And if you thought that Sharon Stone was really good, and a real bad ass in the 1^st. Kate isn’t as sexy because she isn’t as revealing as Stone, but Kate makes her own path for the film. Which is gorgeous with a strong swift kick of bad ass. She literally beats the crap out of Farrell and Biel the entire movie, as well as beating the hell out of every man’s heart, for wishing she could kick their ass in real life.

Farrell as Douglas Quaid, or is he? Does a great job. Of course he is no Ahhnold but he does a damn good job. Especially in the scenes when you truly feel for him for not knowing his real identity. But it’s more drama when he sees the videos of himself prior to the memory crash, leaving clues behind. While Ahhnold’s was a lot more twisted, comical and insane all rolled into one.  

The film has its own good additions, especially revving up Beckinsale, and making her more important and more lethal than Sharon Stone was in the 1^st. Though the film is mostly hit on the upgrades, especially with the special effects and a certain 3 breasted beauty, the film has it’s very bad misses. The clues left behind on video were one of them, and not having a scene as good as that old ladies head blowing up in the airport, with Ahhnold’s head underneath, is a huge let down.

But at the end of the day, there is no point to make this review an explanation of the plot of the movie. Because ultimately, it is a remake.

And no matter how much fun I had, which I did, it’s still a remake. It’s not an original idea.

In a nutshell, Total Recall with Ahhnold is a classic, and Total Recall with Colin Farrell is an extremely noble effort in striking magic twice. It did, but just like the new Conan The Barbarian, it’s unnecessary,